The Facts of Life

Jacob cracks me up like no one else. He is learning new things everyday and is amazed at this new knowledge.

So lately he has been pulling at his boyhood and I am like dude stop that. He says why do I need to stop pulling it? I tell him 'you could hurt it and one day you won't become a daddy.' He looks at me like I lost my marbles and says 'mooooooooooooom, I am a boy and I don't make babies.' I should have left the conversation drop there and been on my way; but I didn't. I went a step further.<----this is a rookie mom mistake and I am not a rookie mom.

I said yeah boys help make babies. He's like 'um how?' Me (nonchalantly) sometimes when a boy and girl are married, they do something where their pee-pees touch and a baby is made. He then took off running and screaming 'OMG Demi do you know when I get married to a girl, I am gonna touch her peepee with my peepee and we are going to have a baby?

She replies 'yeah' she is giggling.

Then Jacob tells his dad hid new found knowledge of how babies are made. Jason is replies 'isn't that gross, Jacob?'

To which Jacob replies 'I am never doing that like ever.'

(He hasn't figured out that was how he was made, he still thinks Jason bought him at the local seed store and I swallowed the seed with water)

Then my lesson is done. Jacob thinks it is gross and that makes me happy.

I have a deep dark secret

please don't tell my mom.

I don't clean the upstairs part of my house. Shhhh.....I live in a 2,000 square foot house and I RARELY ever clean the upstairs. It consists of 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, a loft area and the laundry room (more like a glorified closet). The loft area is for my kids entertainment benefit when they decide there are no monsters living up there or under the futon AND realize the umbilical cord is indeed been cut between us. The kids rooms look like tornados hit it every millisecond of the day. People tell me I have kids, but I go to other peoples houses and their kids room are clean-granted the kids also have separate play rooms ie basement. We do not have a basement.

My bedroom is clean as is my bathroom. I do the laundry, but the overall mess factor gets to me. I also know when adults come over they are hanging out downstairs and the kids further trash the upstairs. So my logic is why bother cleaning?

My downstairs is clean. Not to my mom standards, but she lives in MI, so I don't have to hear her bitch about how horrible of a housekeeper I really am.

Such innocence

So I tucked my kids into bed tonight later than usual. I let them stay up a little bit longer on Friday and Saturday nights.

I turned off Demi's lights and said good night. I went to tend to my clothes that needed hanging up. I am done with that job and walk into loft and notice her light is on with the door slightly ajar. I tip toe over and watch my daughter play dress-up in front of her dresser. She is putting on make-up and doing her hair. She is in some white shorts and her training bra and a purple sash over that I am assuming for a beauty pageant.

As I am watching my oldest child play, I am filled with love for her all over again. I did not get mad at her for disobeying and not going to bed, but I watched her a good 10 minutes and really seeing 'her.' I let her stay up and play, I didn't interrupt her play as I watched how her brain works. Then I saw something else that is really I don't know how to explain, but I saw the future of raising a daughter. She will be one of the girls that is most popular, a leader, she will be making sure she looks perfect before going out with her friends. She will develop her first crush and have a first boyfriend (she is starting to show interest in boys, but will not admit it to me, but I hear the giggles when she is talking to her friends about boys). She will have a first kiss, fall in love, learn to drive a car, make her own decisions, have her own thoughts and ideas; but for now, tonight, I am letting her be an innocent carefree child that thinks unbeknownst to me is sleeping in bed and not playing dress-up as I watch with tears flowing down my cheeks at how precious my daughter is.

Then she came downstairs with a bloody nose and we cuddled on the couch as I ran my fingers through her hair comforting her. That is my job to comfort her when she is hurting. She is teaching me to be a mom and for that I can never thank her for the awesome job she has bestowed upon me. I think she is going to be a great girl, even though most days she will tell you that she believes I hate her. I don't but I am trying to raise her and it is a very hard job; one that she will never understand for a very long time.

Take 2 on my daily life.

So awhile go I wrote a post on my daily life. I thought I would write about my NEW and exciting life with 2 kids in school!
720am-grunt and wake up
721am-find clothes that never made it to the washing machine
725am see if kids are awake b/c hubby woke them or if they are sleeping. They are sleeping
730 all three of us walk downstairs looking like zombies
735 pouring cereal in bowl after you have told the kid they can't have bacon, eggs, hash browns for breakfast-this is not a restaurant.
736 realized you took the kool-aid out of fridge to pour into cereal-swear alot
737 pour new cereal WITH milk
740 feed kids
750 tell kids to hurry up and eat and get dressed.
751 kids still taking sweet time to eat, while I am rushing like a mad woman to make sure all homework is in the correct folder, make lunches.
755am brush daughters hair-curse under breathe when she tells you she want 2 french braids with the purple elastics-ask her for purple elastics and hear I have no clue
813am hurry up with shoes. Melt down ensues b/c the laces loops are not perfect according to OCD daughter
816am hop in mom mobile.
820am get yelled at by my son that he is missing recess b/c of his sister
821-822am kids screaming over the above statement
827am arrive home.SWEET!
828am turn on xmradio LOUD
830am until 255pm surf the internet (read stalk hot celebs), eat hot food, clean up a little, do not do laundry.
300pm drive to pick up kids
315pm kids out of school
316pm kids ask if they can go to friends/park/store/whatever and hear the tantrums when you say it is a school night and there is homework and chores at home to be done.
320-400pm do homework which is always proceeded by homework stinks, can I do it later and me being the mom says just do it now! and have afternoon snack or as my kids try 15 snacks.
4-5pm watch cartoons and hear fighting over whose turn it is to watch a certain show-heaven help us if they don't watch Phineas and Ferb for the millionth time or miss an episode of Spongebob and say the lines word for word..
5pm start dinner, hear I don't want that for dinner, say too bad I am the mom and we are eating this
6pm daddy comes home and hear him complain about shit. I rarely ever hear what he says....he gets in my way most days.
615-eat dinner and fight over telling kids to eat veggies
7pm decide not to do dishes
8pm start bedtime routine, bathtime for 6 year old and shower for 9 year old. 6 year old proceeds to wash the floor with his splashing. the 9 year old is yelling that the water is not hot enough.
815 brush hair and teeth. Tell kids hair needs to be brushed, find out daughter did not rinse conditioner out of hair, tell her to go rinse it and hear yet another meltdown about how it will not leave her hair. You take her back to shower and show her she has to actually STAND under the flow of water to help rinse out conditioner. Curse to yourself she is her fathers daughter.
830 read a story and pick out toys to take to our toy cluttered bed.
831pm they are now trained to not come out of room unless they have a body function that needs tending to.
9-midnight watch adult tv and eat frosting and cookies that I have hidden from my children.

Its a love/hate thing

I hate cleaning house
I hate laundry
I hate lima beans still
I hate loading and unloading the dishwasher
I hate clothes shopping
I hate being bipolar
I hate my Cpap machine
I hate taking my meds

I love vacuuming.
I love my kids
I love my hubby
I love watching House
I love being bipolar
I love driving my van blasting music very loud
I love the internet
I love watching sappy movies
I love going to concerts
I love to lose myself in a great book
I love having a clean house
I love to see my kids playing games and being silly with one another
I love that Jason will come up and kiss me passionately for no reason
I love that I can feed my children healthy food and give them clean water
I love that I can say I have been married 10 years to my best friend
I love that I own a piece of America.

This little list of the things I love keeps me going when the world looks horrible on a daily basis. I am not dwelling on the plight of America. It sucks. I feel no matter who was elected in as President, it still would suck. All I can do is focus my energy on the important things in my life-my kids, my hubby, making sure there are clothes on our backs, food in the bellies and a roof over our head, because when you get right down to it; all you have is your family and for them I am blessed.

I have been on a blog vacation

I had nothing witty to say, so I choose not to wrote when I am without the wit.

Today I went and saw my neuro doctor. Having seizures suck-let me tell you that and add it to having bipolar=major sucko! But it makes my life interesting.

So anyway, I have to wear a CPAP machine-or as I call it the devil incarnate destined to ruin my sex appeal to my hubby at 3am (in case he ever wakes up at that time, I might still be awake, though) Whew that was a long ass run on sentence. Oh well. My thoughts and my writing don't punctuate. LOL.

So I was honest and told the doctor I have not worn the thing all summer. I HATE it! It is like having a squid wrapped around your face forcing you to breathe. Maybe I stopped breathing b/c Jackson or Robert took my breath away-oh right that is what my dreams are made of. He was like why not? I said I am not sleeping very much-like 3 hours a night and I am usually on the couch. He said well why aren't you in your bed sleeping? I tell him my bed is boring. He said doesn't your hubby entertain you? I said nope, as soon as his head hits the pillow he is out cold. Then the doctor says well it is your hubby's job to entertain you and make the bed fun. I think the doc was implying my hubby needs to have sex with me. I am sorry, I am a freak of nature and sex keeps me up for hours. We had a good laugh and talked about meds and then I cried about my lack of sleep.

So I will try the drugs he prescribed and see if it helps or I might have to biofeedback and I am not wanting to do that at all!

When You Wish Upon a Star

Really makes no difference who you are......

A while ago, my children and I were eating dinner and talking about what we would wish for. It is neat and awesome to hear what they want in their world. They are after all of 5 and 8 years old (for a few more weeks-I have 2 Sept. babies). My 5 year old, Jacob, is so innocent in his requests, he has not a care in the world or any idea of ugliness that is out there on this planet. That is the way it should be, he should remain innocent and believe in Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, Tooth fairy (he is waiting patiently for her to arrive), that giggles are contagious, a mother's kiss can cure all boo-boos and there will always be Popsicles in the freezer for him.

My darling Demi, she is 8, understands that some of the world is ugly. She grasps at this age that body image is a driving force in society. That not everyone likes not having money and people struggle with money and sometimes there is just not enough to go around; there is a war happening, that everything is not centered around her, that parents get divorced, that not everything is going be okay. She hasn't believed in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny or the tooth fairy since she was 3-she figured it out when she saw many Santas and none of them looked the same and she didn't buy my story of well he has helpers dear. She has though understood to not ruin the spirit of Santa for the children that still believe in him.

Such a difference in perception in a short 3 years, huh?

So as I was saying, my children and I were talking about what we would wish for if a genie granted us 10 wishes. I forgot that I wrote them all down until I found my notebook. I read it today and smiled as I reflected on their thoughts processes. I remember the day we talked about this vividly. They got so excited, like it could really happen if they wished hard enough. So I wanted to share it with you, maybe it might make you ask your children what they would wish for if they could have a genie and 10 wishes.

Jacob's wish list
1. No Mosquitoes
2. Bees with no stingers
3. To be Rich
4. Wish Wall-E was real
5. a 5 part couch (I have no idea what he means maybe a sectional)
6. Chairs that are more comfortable with no wooden backs to them (my dining chairs have wicker backs to them)
7. Never Rain
8. Wish Christmas was everyday
9. Able to bring both backpacks to school
10.Really big house

Demi's wish list
1. To be smartest person in whole world
2. Be Famous (I think she can achieve this one)
3. Live in Mansion
4. Be able to Fly
5. To have a sister
6. Bigger bedroom
7. Lifetime supply of shoes
8. Be in Book of World Records
9. Have our house painted
10. To have Chicago Cubs win every game

One day I would love to fulfill some of my children's wishes and keep them believing that things will always turn out great for us and our family. We have overcome many obstacles and challenges, but in the long run it has made us stronger.

Peace, love and harmony!